She was so BLONDE that she...
 
1. ...took her new scarf  back to the store because it  was too tight.
 
2. ...couldn't learn to water ski because she couldn't  find a lake with a
slope.
 
3. ...can't work in a pharmacy because the bottles  won't fit into the
typewriter.
 
4. ...got excited because she finished a jigsaw puzzle in 6 months and the
box said "2 to 4 years".
 
5. ...was trapped on an escalator for hours when the  power went out.
 
6. ...couldn't call 911 because there was no "Eleven"  on any phone button.
 
7. ...when asked what the capital of California was, she  answered "C."
 
8. ...burnt her nose bobbing for French Fries.
 
9. ...baked a turkey for 5 days because the  instructions said 1 hour per
pound, and she  weighed 125.
 
10. ...can't make Kool-Aid because 8 cups of water  won't fit into those
little packets.
 
11. ...hates M&M's because they are so hard to peel.
 
12. ...got hurt while raking leaves; fell out of the tree.
 
13. ...after losing in a breaststroke swimming  competition, complained
that
the other swimmers  were using their arms.
 
Now aren't you glad that you're not blonde?